If God were to give me a written answer, what question would I ask…one of the most complicatedly simple things to ponder.
Instinct tells me that all of the answers to life’s questions have already been written out by God by the work of the Holy Spirit in the Bible. Some of you may think what I call instinct is brainwashing or simplicity when it comes too applying Scripture to life. Perhaps you aren’t thinking any of those things at all and have already tuned out.
The question I have been asking God for years is: “Am I good enough and loveable?” From a young age, I learned that I need to prove that I was good enough to receive love. It’s a deep lie that, by God’s grace, has been brought to the surface so it can be squashed. Let me share the first time God wrote out the answer to part of this question (good enough):
“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” (Psalm 139:14 NIV)
I was reflecting on this verse in the middle of a school chapel and noticed how many times full is in that verse. Inside I heard, “now go and live out of that fullness.” I had been meeting with a counsellor at school due to academic difficulties and she was used by God to bring both the “good enough” question to the surface and to help direct me to Scripture to answer it. She pointed out that in the above verse, there is no measuring up to some sort of standard to receive love: “you’re good enough already” she would say. I needed to believe that because I was created or made by God that that was wonderful in and of itself. I did not need to earn wonderful, I was just was wonderful.
As to the loveable part of the question, I have been on quite the journey to trust that God’s love is unconditional. There has been much unlearning that has taken place when looking at what it means to rest in God’s love.
“We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19 NIV)
Trying to find only one part of Scripture where it is written is quite difficult. I could quote so many. This morning I heard a beautiful sermon on God’s unconditional love (here: John 14:15-31 Obedience, Love and the Holy Spirit). A couple things stood out – the smoothness is not where the assurance is and we are perfectly loved by God, even if we are not perfect in showing love. I needed to be reminded that God’s love is unconditionally perfect, He does not need my works or love in return, He shows self-giving love through the trinity… AND He shows His love to us through Christ’s sacrifice and the gift of the Holy Spirit. I have Him to guide me and remind me and spur me on to love Him because of the rest found in His unconditional love, not because I earned it by being good enough.
To anyone who has read this far: You are good enough because you are made in God’s image and His love is unconditional. No matter what, His love remains.